Locally sourced raw hearts of artichoke, lite mauve seeded grapes and soaked recycled confetti in a Boone’s Farm Strawberry Hill vinaigrette served with cracked baby lamb knuckles in a tangelo and garden chervil glaze accompanied by assorted paper airplanes and arrowroot of the day.

Artisanal beer drenched garden slugs topped with pickled sweet Kentucky olives, freeze-dried shoelaces and desiccated licorice seed with a dusting of corn smut and served with a chipotle okra bowl and a side of shallot waffles.

A generous stack of dried black crow crepes with choice of dingle berry chartreuse syrup, goat’s honey, or elixir of white soy bean mush, served with overdone dermatitis hash, burgoo and a side of headcheese.

Homemade fiddlehead fern ragout with sun-dried grass-fed stomach, accordion root slaw, and sun-grown bubble and squeak complimented by free-range sweetbread tempura and a tour of the men’s room.

A starter of pope’s nose orange roughy followed by organic turducken soaked in eggplant ale for 75 hours and roasted slowly over the La Brea tar pits served with Frito coated jumbo frankfurters, whirled peas, parched yellow dryer lint and rocky slope grown cock’s comb.

Stinking corpse lily with stink removed served with a copious amount of distastefully loud music and blackened cream over jet fuel pasta, select fresh pomegranate pillows and wild-crafted roadside noxious weeds.

Dessert menu

Cosmic muffin
Whoopee pie, shoofly pie, funeral pie, life of pi
Blueberry grunt, dishwasher grunt
Mincemeat leather with carob crusted Boston baked beans



Penelope Starr loves lists, stories, and lists that tell a story. She founded Odyssey Storytelling (odysseystorytelling.com) in Tucson, Arizona over 10 years ago so she could hear lots of stories every month.

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